Lady Gaga at The Conference House

After an evening fishing at the Conference House Beach in Tottenville tonight we were walking along the gravel road back to the car when we heard the sounds of Lady Gaga's "Bad Romance" wafting through the air like a foul stench from a New Jersey refinery over the Bayonne.

But, thing is, the sound wasn't coming out of some douchebag's car window - as is usually the case - it was actually a live band.

Had the humidity finally gotten to us? Should we have packed Dasani instead of PBR? Was Lady Gaga performing at the Conference House Park?

No, it was actually more sad and pathetic than that.

It was the band Alive and Kickin', a spent-up '70s one-hit wonder act which now specializes in parties and weddings. The event was part of Borough President Oswald Copperpot's Starlight Concert Series on Staten Island over the summer. (btw, we think this may be their website, but could not verify because it literally made us dizzy.)

Copperpot, who is old, out-of-touch, and demented politically, apparently has the same afflictions when it comes to musical taste. But we can't lay this one on him.

Who is in charge of these "cultural events" that take place on Staten Island? How much money do they dole out on these half-assed acts that only pique the interest interest your stoner uncle?

Whoever it is: you failed.

Sonic Youth is playing in Prospect Park on Sunday for a suggested donation of 3 dollars.

The Jelly NYC Pool Parties are weekly free events on the Williamsburg waterfront and have the fervent backing and support of New York Senator Chuck Schumer.

Now, we doubt Brooklyn's Marty Markowitz is a huge Sonic Youth fan, or that Schumer enjoys rocking out to Lighting Bolt after a day on the Chamber floor.

There's obviously some intermediary that can organize these events and make successful, relevant, publicly-funded entertainment in the City.

But, for now, Staten Island will just have to settle for covers of "Bad Romance."

Ga ga ohh lala...