Welcome Walter Schreifels to Cargo Cafe

Walter Schreifels (the dude from seminal hardcore band Gorilla Biscuits, influential '90s pre-emo power group Quicksand, and also Rival Schools) will be visiting Staten Island for the first time Saturday night.

Give him a nice welcome. It's not everyday we get a legendary musician playing a small venue on Bay Street.

The show is at Cargo Cafe. 8 bucks. Pablo and The Amber Jets are opening. DJ Mike Spinella is, well, DJing. It's a no-brainer.

There's really not much else to say except some people have bitched about the cover charge. Get over it. Some adults need to earn a living.

For the younger folks: the dude opened for Weezer. How awesome is that?

Wow, there's a lot of Old Man Bars on SI

The Cargo Cafe was closed tonight (rumors abound) so we needed to choose a drunken alternative.

We were traveling around the Island, doing "research" and discovered something.

There are a shit load of dirty old man bars that cater to burnt out drunkards who may or nay not ride motorcycles and have receding hair lines.

But you know what? these bars aren't half bad.

At first there was some general awkwardness, but after we played some Journey and Van Morrison on the juke box, the party was on.

Dudes were buying us shots and having general drunken conversation.

This particular pub on Victory blvd had a few pool tables, dartboards, TVs w/ both Yankee and Met games.

The bathrooms were dirty cesspools and there were more than a few bikes parked outside.

The bartender lady even gave us a pair us glasses because we lost ours in a drunken outing at Marie's Gourmet.

The glasses were for the Mets game, which was lost in extra innings, but the sentiment was important.

So y'all have a fav dive bar on SI? or is Martini Red the only place to go?

Our sincerest apologies

SI Dump started with the humble intentions of mixing some good old fashioned reporting with honest criticism about the elusive and misunderstood boro of Staten Island.

The Island is often maligned and deserves better.

We love Staten Island, why else would we name our dump after it?

But we made a mistake -- a big one.

We dabble in criticism. In the past we have tackled small potatoes like former-US Rep. Vito Fossella, indie rockers Cymbals Eat Guitars, billionaire mayor Mike Bloomberg, the boro president, and the Zoo's groundhog. These guys are nobodys.

But we struck a chord when made wrote a social critique that alluded a two-man dance troupe from brooklyn.

We had no idea that this act was so important to Staten Island, so integral to its culture- its very existence.

First off, everything on Staten Island is culturally, aesthetically, and morally superior to everything else, everywhere. just 'cause, don't argue with us.

with one exception: these guys.

it turns out these are nice dudes. they travel across the Verrazano and entertain us out of the goodness of their hearts.

of course, we have plenty of local talent who can provide the service of karaoke hand-holding, but these guys do it better: they have funny names, sick dance moves, and gold mother fucking teeth!!

Our staff would like to offer our apologies and put this to rest so we can go back to analyzing why the South Shore is so fucking lame, right?

Hipster-fication of Staten Island

The word hipster is a completely manufactured term. It made a lot of people mad in the last decade. They wrote essays and treatise about this new demographic, but one thing is undeniably clear: the market will tap into this trend. Whenever people can be easily lumped into a category, corporations will tap that shit in order to make tons of money off the suckers through generic marketing campaigns.

Which brings us to Staten Island. Many people predicted the next influx of so-called 'hipsters' would come to this borough (via the new bullshit condos by the ferry). But the real estate market tanked, making Bushwick more desirable. And everybody knows hipsters don't ride ferries, so these new luxury apts were vacant and the island kept it college-and-white trash contingent in tact.

But Cargo Cafe has still found a venue to tap into the hipster phenomenon -- Karaoke killed the cat. This two man minstrel show comes into town once a week and brings a party that more than doubles the drunk guidos you usually find at the establishment.

We know it's all fun and games, but what is the appeal with this act? Is just karaoke, right? well, no it's actually karaoke with two condescending dancers backing you up. But wait, can't any Staten Island troupe show up at a local haunt and put on a similar stunt? Well, that wouldn't be as unique, you see. The fact that these people come from "somewhere else" gives it that outsider appeal - the minstrel show.

So Karaoke night at the Cargo continues to be one of the most popular weekly events, eclipsing original music nights from bands like Pablo. What this says about Island culture we will leave others to decide, just thought we'd put the observation out there.

Second Saturday Art Festival

Tonight there'll be all sorts of art, music, performance pieces, drinking, debauchery (maybe) in St. George just a walk away from the Ferry.

The event, called Second Saturdays, is billed as an arts exhibit intended to draw crowds to the Island's north shore, boost tourism and showcase artists living and working in the neighborhood.

We are especially curious to hear some of the bands performing including Whistlin’ Wolves and SI rockabilly band Nick Williams & the Anteaters -- who knew?

January might not have been the best month to start this, the forecast says 24 degrees, but it should be interesting. Schedule is pasted below. (Warning: the Cargo Cafe sched is a bit misleading, The Budos Band is not playing.)

Assembly Room
15 Corson Ave. 2nd Fl.
Directors/Curators: Brendan Coyle and Amanda Curtis
Artists: Katie Torn, Tom Ronse, Demetrius Felder, Brendan Coyle, Amanda Curtis
Reception: Jan. 9th 6pm-12am
Open House: Jan. 10th 1pm-5pm

Blue Mohawk Lounge
9 Corson Ave. 3rd Fl.
Directors/Curators: Johann Rublein and Leilani Pickett
Artists: Johann Rublein and Leilani Pickett (Staten Island); Eliza Bazilian (Manhattan)
January 9th 6pm-12am

SelzeRez
180 Corson Ave.
Screenings and Artists: pending
(times)

Château de Dada
123 Scribner Ave.
Directors/Curators: Mary Campbell and Vivian Vassar
Activities: Day De Dada Art Recycling Program
Screening: Videos from the MWF Video Club Archive
January 9th 4pm- 7pm

ETG Cafe
208 Bay St.
Directors/Curators: Stvn Jns Daughs
Live Music: 8pm Whistlin' Wolves - 9pm Wahoo Skiffle Crazies
Paintings: Carl Avidano

Nick Fevelo
33 Central Ave. 6G
Director/Curator: Nick Fevelo
Exhibition: Screaming Nutcracker
Artists: Brendan Coyle, Amanda Curtis, and Alma Benussi
Times: 6pm-9pm

15 Cent
15 Central Ave. #2A
Directors/Curators: David and Jen Bianco & Sabrina Mazza
Exhibition: Live Music, Living Sculpture, Performances TBA
Times: 6pm-9pm

SHOW Gallery
156 Stuyvesant Pl.
Director/Curator: Theo Dorian
Exhibition: GLAM!
Artist: Mick Rock
6pm-9pm

Top Flight
100 Stuyvesant Pl. 5A
Director: Don Porcella
Curator: Ginger Shulick
Exhibition: 5 Artists 5 Boroughs
Artists: Laura Napier (Bronx), Jason Douglas Griffin (Queens), Brian Leo (Manhattan), Sergio Coyote (Brooklyn), Nick Fevelo (Staten Island)
Times: January 9, 4pm-10pm; January 10, 12-5pm

Mandy Machine
100 Stuyvesant Pl. G-1
Director: Mandy Morrison
Installation, Performance
Times: January 9th, 4pm-10 PM

NorthxSouth
47 Hamilton Ave.
Director: Mercedes Duff
Curator: Ginger Shulick
Exhibition: North Meets South
Artists: Blanka Amezkua and Ray Sell
Times: January 9, 4pm-10pm; January 10, 12-5pm

CPG Gallery, (Creative Photographers' Guild)
814 Richmond Terrace
Rear View
Featured Photographer: Marilyn Kiss
Times: January 9th 5pm-8pm

Art at Bay
70 Bay St.
Director: Tim Moran
Artists: Kristopher Johnson, Jonathan Leiter, Matt Long, Mike Ruffo, Leon Stewart, Julius Wasserstein, Sharon Wasserstein, Linda Wasylewski, Janet Wenger
Times: January 9th 6pm-9pm

Staten Island Museum
75 Stuyvesant Pl.
Free admission

Cargo
120 Bay St.
Artists: Rudolph Montanez, Dave Derwin, Mike Shane, Adam Bridgewater, and The Budos Band on the exterior.
Mikhael Antone: To A Man Documentary 9pm
Times: After party
Food served until 2am open til 4am
Food and drink specials for Art walkers. A slip will be available at galleries for free admission to the After Party

Cheap Laughs at Cargo Cafe

Locals comedian James Harris is hosting another stand-up comedy night at the Cargo Cafe, appropriately called "Grab Ass Stand Up," and here's just a few reasons why you should attend:

1. It's free: on a scale of 1 to 10 price-wise, this would have to be a 10.

2. Ridiculous drink specials: $2 Beers $3 shots & Well Drinks. $6 for a pbr 2 sliders and fries! That's almost as good as White Castle, without the morning after stomach pains.

3. Great line-up: real working comedians from all over the country who are actually funny.

4. Support your local scene: Let's hear jokes on Staten Island instead of just jokes about Staten Island. If we don't support the local arts/music/entertainment scene the borough will continue to be a punchline and one-dimensional depiction of MTV reality shows.

Sean Patton - Crackhead Aunt

Starts at 9:30

line-up:

Sean Patton (Comedy Central)
Max Fox (Aspen Comedy Festival)
John Szeluga (Mid-evenings with Jay Miller)
Adam Pateman (Every ones favorite Canadian)
Hosted by James Harris

@ Cargo Cafe 120 Bay St SI NY.
just 2 blocks from the Free Staten Island Ferry!