Sunday, February 28, 2010

The Chinese wage war on Staten Island?

Do you guys remember the good old days of 2008? That was when was launched.

It was awesome. People could go there, network, blog it up, talk to friends, meet new ones, and find out about all the cool art happenings on Staten Island -- all in one place. It was fantastic.

But then, sometime around December, something terrible happened.

The site was sabotaged, spammed, hacked, destroyed. I don't have official confirmation on this but it may have been the Chinese.

Look at this quote from an article by James Fallows in the Atlantic:
"I now lose sleep over something I'd generally ignored: the possibility of a 'cyber war' that could include attacks from China."
The shit has hit the fan people. A "cyber war" is being waged and Staten Island is on the virtual front lines. We need to fight back and we need to do it together.

I'm not sure how to fight a "cyber war" but I have some ideas. Anyone who plays Call of Duty, World of Warcraft, Pac Man, please contact us and we will begin training for a new virtual army of video game players that can take the Chinese down and save once and for all.

(Update: we think that PopTartsSuck has been attacked by the Chinese as well. This is just more evidence that the Red Army is targeting Staten Island. What can be next? SILive? DogandPonyShow? The Tea Party? Get your joysticks ready, we need all the thumbs we can get to beat Communist China.)

Saturday, February 27, 2010

St. George 'artist' will start his own band

An island artist, in his mid-to-late 20s, started a band recently that he says will be "completely fucking ridiculous."

Mark Schooler, who lives in an apartment in St. George, said that the band did not have a name as of yet.

"We have a few ideas," he said. "I want it to be zany. Like something you wouldn't expect."

The band will play a combination of originals and covers and will be "sort of like a cross between Johnny Cash and Animal Collective."

"I know it sounds weird but, you know what's crazy about it? I don't even like Johnny Cash."

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Look out America: The deuce is coming

Are you ready to do number two?

America needs to wake up and smell the mochachino.

Don't you realize that our freedoms are being stripped from us right now?

Why doesn't anyone want to see Obama's birth certificate? Why doesn't anyone care that he's a secret hindu?

We are at war. The second revolution is coming: the deuce.

Staten Island is lucky to have groups like the Tea Party Patriots on our side.

When the shit hits the fan, you can count on them 'cause they stockpile weapons in their dens/jack-off chambers.

Just look at how fuckin' American this video is! If you don't shit your pants with patriotism your probably just some closeted commie.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

In light of the recent Snug Harbor developments

Some lady who nobody likes is leaving Snug Harbor. Whatevs.

The Dump wanted to share an interesting YouTube clip for the New York ONEz.

It's an oldy, but a goody.

Monday, February 15, 2010

Lessons in journalizm: The Ad-vance

Now, for those not acutely aware of the basic tenants of journalism the old-school rule is that there is a theoretical wall separating different aspects of a news-gathering organization.

Specifically the walls separating the straight news side of the paper from its editorial page, and more importantly the one that isolates the advertising department from the entire newsroom.

A piece in today's Advance doesn't just breach this wall but plows right into it with a bulldozer:
STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. -- Customers crowded the appliance section of P.C. Richard & Son in New Springville today, many of them clutching glossy inserts they pulled out of their Sunday and Thursday Advance advertising big rebates from the state on energy efficient washers and refrigerators, alongside steep Presidents Day weekend discounts.
Don't get me wrong, I love the Advance. If it wasn't for that paper I'd probably never would have entered this shitty profession. But, really, what the fuck is going on in this paragraph?

P.C. Richard is given a huge shout out right before casually mentioning the ad campaign waged by the store in your god damn paper. Really, is this supposed to be a disclosure?

Let's move on:
In fact appliance retailers across the borough said they saw business buoyed by as much as 40 percent this long weekend...
So it wasn't just P.C. Richard's, it was "in fact" stores all over the island. But we won't mention those other retailers, 'cause they didn't fucking pay us anything.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Can Staten Island win WNYC's Battle of the Boroughs?

The AWE's Ben Johnson has posted a helpful and informative blog about WNYC's upcoming Battle of the Boroughs.
"Whether or not you feel that Staten Island should draw the glance of those who don't live here, it is undeniable that putting yourselves out there results in a higher form of play."
It seems like a great opportunity for a no-name Island group to make some waves beyond the local 'scene.' Sure, maybe a little doucey but, what isn't in the music biz these days?

So what are we gonna do Staten? Let's take a few guesses:
  1. nothing

  2. gripe about williamsburg

  3. book another show at Martini Red

  4. learn how to play a set of Arcade Fire tunes

  5. score some blow

  6. make trivial observations about my grammar
If anyone does actually decided to join the fracas, it would be apropo to stop by his blog and drop a note. After all, he does spend most of his time hyping your mediocre band. Something like "hey man, thanks for the info. this is the greatest idea eva" -- or, "this contest is wack, our band is way above this high school nonsense."

See, you could just copy (ctrl+c) and paste (ctrl + v) -- we made it THAT easy for you.

Now, we know the locals would rather have someone we "know" like all-star blogger Paul Bruno running shit at the Advance. But, how many times can we argue over which Angry Samoans record is their greatest?

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Anyone understand what this dude is saying?

Some guy murdered some other guy (allegedly).

He, kind of admits it - sort of.

The Advance has video of him saying something, I guess.

We watched it three times, can't understand it.

Sunday, February 7, 2010

Who is the greatest Mike on Staten Island?

The Democrats are still reeling from their Senate loss in Massachusetts, and the question for Staten Island's Congressman Mike McMahon is: can he hold on to his seat in the 2010 elections?

McMahon rode into office during the presidential election of 2008. It didn't hurt that he was vying for the seat of the scandal-plagued Vito Fossella and to top it off his main rival, Frank Powers, died of a heart attack during the campaign.

McMahon won handily with 61 percent, in the only district in New York City that voted for John McCain. But the political winds are changing, to say the least.

McMahon faces a fresh crop of Republican candidates, and a growing storm from the activist Staten Island Tea Party.

Staten Island Republicans have backed former FBI agent and Gulf War veteran Michael Grimm as a potential nominee. The first-time candidate has the sacred blessing of former borough president/ SI kingmaker Guy Molinari. During his coming out ceremony at the Hilton Garden Inn, Grimm came out swinging in, trying to appease the Tea Party crowd.

"The only thing we can trust is that (McMahon) will be a faithful vote for the Pelosi liberal regime," said Grimm.

Coming from the Brooklyn side of the district (which includes a few influential neighborhoods) is another Mike: Michael Allegretti. Allegretti made the convenient move over the Verrazano to Rosebank and has been endorsed by the Islandwide Republican Club -- which has about 100 members. The Brooklyn transplant was a bit more guarded in his statements about the current congressman, stressing smaller government and fiscal conservatism -- stuff the 13th district can get behind.

So it’s looking to be a race of the "three Mikes," as the Brooklyn Eagle has called it. It will be interesting to see which Republican candidate can grab the attention of the Island: the more dignified, perhaps milquetoast approach of Allegretti, or the partisan backbiting Tea Party enthusiast Grimm. Only time, and enormous campaign contributions, can sorts these things out.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

How to score coke

Looks like a few 'chefs' got arrested for selling coke outside a North Shore establishment, according to this report by the Advance.

"Thomas (T.J.) Gleason, the 34-year-old chef at the Ruddy and Dean North Shore Steak House, and another man, Ralph Fleischmann, 40, have both been arrested on felony drug dealing charges, accused of selling $100 worth of cocaine at the bar."

Shocking, right. Well not really, but here's what is:

Sources tell us that one of the 'chefs' in question, Thomas (T.J.) Gleason now works literally right down the block at Jimmie Steiny's Pub. So if you need any coke, just go there.

In Staten Island, if you get caught selling coke at the job, no worries. Just walk about 1/4 mile down the road to find a new gig.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

SI meme of the week: Chuck

Bloomberg gives a little help to his friends

City officials went into damage control yesterday after incidents surrounding a political operative gave a glimpse into the underbelly of patronage in local politics.

The operative, Maura Keaney, was announced as the director of external affairs for the Department of Education on Monday, the same day that the city’s Conflicts of Interest Board announced a fine against her for violating city ethics laws.

The ethics violation was made in 2007, during her tenure as deputy chief of staff to Council Speaker Christine Quinn. But, more recently, Keaney worked for Mayor Bloomberg’s re-election campaign, and was handed a healthy bonus of $150,000 after she helped him win a third term.

“It’s the age old question of political patronage in politics,” said Richard Flanagan, chair of the political science department at CUNY’s College of Staten Island.
“In one sense you have political favors to a campaign worker,” he argued, “but on the other hand the mayor should be able to appoint people who are smart and competent.”

Keaney is said to receive $143,000 a year from her new position. The DOE declined to comment yesterday but the chancellor of New York City schools, Joel Klein, praised Ms. Keaney in a press release.

“Maura is an innovative thinker and advocate with a record of serving the interest of New Yorkers from positions both in and outside of government,” Chancellor Klein said.

The mayor was also dogged by questions yesterday and tried to deflect the criticism while talking to reporters.

“She is as smart a woman and exactly the kind of woman we need at the Department of Ed," the mayor said of Keaney.

"She worked very hard for Chris Quinn. Somebody said to her, ‘You might have violated some of the rules.’ She said, ‘I don’t think so, but I’m going to go to the Conflict of Interest Board.’"

The mayor’s remarks did not exactly match the official version of events which has Keaney’s lawyers contacting the COIB only after an article ran in the New York Times highlighting her actions.

“This event was two and a half years ago, and I just don’t remember that much about it,” Keaney said when the issue was first raised in October of last year.

Keaney ran field operations for Bloomberg’s re-election bid and received a sum of $8,500 every two weeks, according to campaign records, in addition to her large bonus.

The ethics violation is unrelated to Bloomberg’s campaign but seemed to come at an unfortunate time for all parties involved.

The $2,500 fine was levied because of Keaney’s involvement in organizing a fundraiser for Speaker Quinn with a large union group called Unite Here.

New York City conflict of interest laws prohibit public servants with “substantial policy discretion” from soliciting campaign contributions.

Keaney had previously served as the political director of Unite Here, the organization she had solicited contributions from, and her ties to large labor helped garner support for Bloomberg during the 2009 campaign.

Keaney had been in talks for the DOE position for the past few weeks, according to dept. officials, and will begin working on Feb 3, just two days after the ethics violation was handed down from the COIB.

“I wouldn’t have exactly rushed to put her in a job,” said CUNY’s Richard Flanagan. “She got a pretty good bonus from the campaign. She could have lived off of that for a while.”