Monday, March 15, 2010

Our sincerest apologies

SI Dump started with the humble intentions of mixing some good old fashioned reporting with honest criticism about the elusive and misunderstood boro of Staten Island.

The Island is often maligned and deserves better.

We love Staten Island, why else would we name our dump after it?

But we made a mistake -- a big one.

We dabble in criticism. In the past we have tackled small potatoes like former-US Rep. Vito Fossella, indie rockers Cymbals Eat Guitars, billionaire mayor Mike Bloomberg, the boro president, and the Zoo's groundhog. These guys are nobodys.

But we struck a chord when made wrote a social critique that alluded a two-man dance troupe from brooklyn.

We had no idea that this act was so important to Staten Island, so integral to its culture- its very existence.

First off, everything on Staten Island is culturally, aesthetically, and morally superior to everything else, everywhere. just 'cause, don't argue with us.

with one exception: these guys.

it turns out these are nice dudes. they travel across the Verrazano and entertain us out of the goodness of their hearts.

of course, we have plenty of local talent who can provide the service of karaoke hand-holding, but these guys do it better: they have funny names, sick dance moves, and gold mother fucking teeth!!

Our staff would like to offer our apologies and put this to rest so we can go back to analyzing why the South Shore is so fucking lame, right?


  1. wait ... these guys are from Brooklyn?
    aren't we supposed to hate everyone from brooklyn because they are hipsters?

  2. right bread. thanks for pointing this out.
    we are supposed to hate everyone from brooklyn.
    except them. they are the exception.

    also, if you were actually born in brooklyn, we can't hate you then, youre immune. just people who moved there since about 2003-4ish.

    It's a bit complicated. It's in the SI borough charter (on Molinaro's office wall) you can see for yourself.

  3. The difference is that everyone in Brooklyn thinks they're better than us. That's why we hate them.

    The KKTC guys party with us. Therefore, they don't think they're better than us. Therefore, we don't hate them no matter how well they would fit in at

  4. oh ok.. i see.
    thanks for clarifying.

  5. Paul's comment made me curious so i did some research and found a clause in the towne charter:

    "thou shalt receive all those who paddle across thee harbor bearing gifts and shall forgive any brooklynites of previous transgressions as stated in section 3 subsection F of the boro bylaws and civil code of conduct"

    i guess that settles it. thanks to everyone for their help on this.