Bill Clinton comes to Staten Island

Bill Clinton and Mike McMahon will be battling each other for which politician has the pastiest white skin.

Srlsy, though, Bill Motherfucking Clinton, the 42nd President of the United States, will be on Staten Island this Friday to rally support for Democratic congressional incumbent and Irish gigolo, Mike McMahon.

The event, held Friday afternoon at Wagner College's Spiro Hall, should help raise McMahon's clout among the mindless Island independents (the ones who keep voting for Bloomberg even though he's mad liberal, and keeps stiffin' the Island.)

We wonder if Team Grimm could pull a president out of their ass?

George W. is in hiding, writing his memoirs. America's mayor, Rudy Giuliani, will likely give his ugly wig a spin around Staten Island to rally support for Grimm, but there is only so many benefits that man can reap off 9/11.

Maybe Grimm could see McMahon's Clinton and raise a... Sarah Palin?

Here's how to get in:

Bieber, Raekwon and ... Antoine Dodson?

It's the collaboration you've been waiting for - so you can say you hate it.

You would think a Justin Bieber song should not begin with the legendary riff from "Wu-Tang Clan Ain't Nuthing Ta Fu-- Wit." But, this one does.

Raekwon storms in for a verse, but then the inevitable Biebs arrives, and then Kanye, and well - it's all downhill from there.

Could this be the first song created from crowd-sourcing and social networks? Did the allure of the Biebs trap Rae into this awful collab? Is it the end of an era? Is hip-hop dead?

Well, obviously, Antoine Dodson thinks so:

Ok, well someone who used his meme, but they have a point.

Here's the song:

Filthy South Shore watering hole should close

As details emerge from this weekend's fatal car crash involving teenagers on the South Shore, we learned that the underage kids were drinking at a bar in a deserted strip mall - a shithole dive called The Clubhouse.

Police are reporting that the vehicle was carrying six passengers and a source told the Advance they were traveling "at least 90 mph" down Arthur Kill Road. (Is it possible to do 90 on Arthur Kill?)

It's a tragedy for the families and while the survivors (the two conscious ones) can shed some light on who is responsible for this tragedy they are giving police the silent treatment.

Some people need to take responsibility for this completely avoidable event - a mistake that killed two passengers and could have taken any other innocent victim in its way.

Do not send Guido Paulie on a beer run

Number 1 mistake.

When you run out of beer at the backyard stripper-filled BBQ, don't send Guido Paulie to the store. Guidos can't do anything right, and they'll probably get Coors Light.

As this documentary locally-produced beer commercial shows, parties on Staten Island need beer, and nerds know where to buy it. Wait. Whaaat?

A very plausible Casey Jost look-a-like saves the day in this piece by keeping it Staten and shopping at Bridge Beverage (somewhere on the South Shore). And Guido Paulie - what a dick - gets caught in traffic riding to Jersey.

Moral of the story: effe Jersey. Guidos are dope, but unreliable. Also, Staten Island has hot chics and awesome BBQs.

Don't believe us? Watch the video for yourself:

Staten Island needs more Scott Stringer, less Archie Bunker

Unlike the fossilized goon we have in boro hall, Manhattan Borough President Scott Stringer can address a complex issue without insulting innocent bystanders.

Stringer recently went on Fox News to discuss some of the 'August crazy' stories with opportunist flip-flopper Laura Ingraham -- and the debated got real heated, real fast.

"This is your Tea Party friends trying to create an election year issue, and we all know it," Stringer says with a zen-like calm that is unmatched on America's favorite hate channel.

One interesting piece of the convo was how Laura Ingraham completely dismisses the Muslim cab driver story after it's brought up by Stringer.

Now, as Ingraham rightfully says, we "don't know all the facts" but let's do an experiment on this one:

This is a channel that hypes non-stories of Black Panthers, helped Shirley Sherrod get fired, and insists that the President is a black supremacist.

Imagine that it was a Muslim immigrant who slashed an innocent college boy because, well, he's white and 'American.' Do you really think Fox News would let a story like this go, because they "don't know all the facts"??

Drunk guy terrorizes mosque

Really, people? C'mon.

A man terrorized a group of Muslims trying to pray in a Queens mosque last night.

The details are horrific, and embarrassing. As raunchy as this blog can get we won't even re-print them. You can read it here and here if you want.

Point is: enough is enough.

This disturbing information comes on these heels of yesterday's horrific attack on a cab driver and - as mosque haters tried to run from this guy ('he's a left-winger!') - we learn that the attacker actually had a diary with "pretty strong anti-Muslim comments."

This is hatred, plain and simple, boiling over, aided and abetted by those who want to cast this as a 'save America' issue.

Cab driver stabbed for being Muslim

All this heated rhetoric against Muslims has reached a confusing fever pitch, and it's not clear who is terrorizing whom.

Police say that a New York City cab driver was stabbed Monday night by a 21-year-old man who hailed the taxi and allegedly asked, "Are you Muslim?"

When the cab driver responded "Yes" the young (maniac? patriot?) proceeded to slash the gentleman's throat, arm, and lip.

More details will probably emerge from this incident but, as it stands, it looks as if the anti-mosque crowd may have taken a dangerous turn off the crazy cliff.

On Sunday, a guy was shouted down at the Park51 protest because, well, he looked like a Muslim (aka black and wearing skull cap).

Some of this misdirected hatred comes from Staten Island. We told you back in June about Jimmy Soprano. The Midland Beach debacle was aided and abetted by the 'no-comments' from local so-called leaders.

A lot of public officials and news outlets have went out of their way to feed this hatred (Molinaro, Fox News).

Here's what Molinaro wrote about the Park51 mosque:

"It's being put there as a symbol of what they did on 9/11."

Who the fuck are 'they'? The terrorists? The Sufi Muslims? Both? Either Molinaro is a callow idiot or he actually believes the diarrhea coming out of his mouth.

Instead of calling for understanding and reconciliation, the boro pres and others have helped spread this incorrect narrative that the downtown mosque two blocks from ground zero is some sort of tribute to the terrorists -- it's not.

The mosque is run by moderate Sufi Muslims who have been working to integrate Islam with American culture. The Imam worked closely with the Bush Administration on these very issues. Many people are avoiding these facts to exploit the situation for political gain. And it should stop, before more people get hurt.

Jersey blames us for their crappy show

The results are in.

A new Quinnipiac poll tackles the pressing concern about what state is to blame for this returning phenomenon as contagious as an unwanted STD - otherwise known as MTV's reality show 'Jersey Shore.'

One-third of New Jersey residents blame New York for these retarded misfits, and when they say 'New York' you know who they're talkin' about.

Also, more than half of the state finds the show revolting, which would make them about 50 percent right.

"Garden State voters don't like the show and believe it's bad for the state," said some guy in charge of the polling.

By our informal head count three members from this illustrious 'Jersey Shore' cast hail from Staten: Angelina, some douchebag, and some other douchbag.

But all this hard data left us with one burning question:

Why the effe did they conduct a poll on this? Isn't there other problems in this country that need to be addressed and analyzed by the Quinnipiac polling farm?

Bulldozers loom over Cedar Grove

The residents of Cedar Grove Beach Club near New Dorp have six weeks left before the city kicks them out on the street so they can build some sort of crappy beachside park in its place.

Thankfully Cedar Grove has some high-profile local politicians on their side, but it remains to be seen if their action will be enough to save the beleaguered bungalows.

Today Congressman Mike McMahon, Councilman James Oddo, and others pleaded with Mayor Bloomberg to leave those people and their cozy cottages alone:

"The clock is ticking on this and the Cedar Grove residents need [Mayor Bloomberg] to interject his common-sense approach sooner rather than later,” McMahon said in a press release.

The Beach Club is battling the city who currently owns the property. It was ceased during the reign of Robert Moses in the 1950s with the intent of building a highway on the shoreline.

The highway was never built, like a lot of Moses projects, and the property was leased with the understanding that it could be taken back at any time, and apparently that time has come.

Parks commissioner Adrian Benepe said the city will destroy all but two bungalows, which will serve as a snack shack or something.

McMahon and others have called for landmark status for the historic community.

You can visit the Cedar Grove Beach Club Facebook page here.

New Pablo video: 'Wall Street'

Oh look, a new Pablo video.

This Sepia-toned version of 'Wall Street' from a recent (few months ago) performance at the Apple Store in the Staten Island Mall captures a sliver of the performance.

The hollowed out folk tune ruminates on death, careers, and the acquiescence to our better halves, before exploding into a raucous coda. It's Neil Young with a score to settle.

The band will be playing at Spike Hill in Brooklyn next month, and at The Bitter End with The Headlocks in October.

If you haven't heard their album 'There's Rope to Leave' you should be ashamed of yourself.

Oh, and Les Vinyl is playing at the same Apple Store on Thursday.